The Great Registry Debate

There is a great debate that some may know about out, but all those who are planning a wedding do know about; to register or not to register, for gifts that is.

Now wedding etiquette says that you must register for you are starting a new marriage household and need things to help build that foundation. Wedding etiquette also says, that if you don't register you are sending the message that all you want is money which is a no no in the world of weddings.

So as most people know Sharine and I have been together for eleven years now and five of those years we have actually shared a household along with our kids. Now when sharing a household you tend to accumulate even more especially when there are 4 people living in it. Keeping this in mind we have begun our own debate. Not a debate on whether we should register or not, but where to register. After equally deciding we did not want to register we were reminded that if we didn't it would scream 'give us money', but also people have already begin asking us where are we registered?.

That is a loaded question.

With so many places that you can be registered at it's really hard to decide. Then when you top that with the fact that we don't want to register it makes the 'where' decision even harder.

So as we begin to look at the usual places like discount stores (Target, Walmart etc..), department stores (Macys), and speciality stores (Bed, Bath & Beyond, Crate & Barrel etc...) it makes me realize I have to begin to stress myself over choosing things I do not really need. Then of course you read & hear : well just upgrade what you already have. But what if you like what you already have? and why should you have money being spent on something you already have that works perfectly well?!?

Okay now just when you think the decision couldn't be any harder comes the whole modern technology twist; online registries. Now this twist doesn't just come with the fact that you can register with the above mentioned stores online, it also comes with the fact that there are even more registry choices; honeymoon registries, buying a house registries, and even the giant elephant in the room cash registries. Now compound this with the fact that we are getting married on a cruise ship and the cruise line ask that we let guest know that due to security reasons they cannot board with presents.

I believe I've just fainted and gone to registry hell!

Make Up Trials (Round #2)

So Sha and I had our 2nd make-up trials yesterday. Our original make-up artist who's work we liked could not re-book us when we changed our date from May to July.

This time around I went for a more dramatic eye look since I wear glasses. I really liked the job she did. Sha on the other hand felt she looked to made up this time around. So although she loved her eyes, the foundation was a bit much for her. I won't say that she looked like a corpse, cause she already said it lol.

At any rate, we were really hoping that her make-up could be a little less made up on the day of the wedding as we really liked the make-up artist and want to work with her. She seemed really friendly with a down to earth personality. As she did my make-up she asked me questions about the wedding and we chit chatted a bit. Her sister who is also a make-up artist worked on Sha and she was quieter.

Today I emailed the make-up artist to tell her that although I liked her work, Sha was not very pleased with her look. It was a very nice surprise when I read her response that apologized for it and offered to do both our make-up on the day of the wedding (Sha had really liked the way she kept me looking more natural). This is especially nice considering she would have to start at least an hour earlier and we are already meeting her early in the morning.


Here are the before & after pictures:

Dana

Sharine

Lucky us.... I think!

For our wedding we are only having one bridesmaids which is our almost 14 year old, and one groomsman....our son who will be 21 by then. On the day we shopped for our wedding gowns we also had the opportunity for our girl child to try on dresses just to get an idea of what might look good on her. We will not be purchasing until closer to our July date since her size has changed and we have no idea what size she will be by then.

More than likely we will go back to David's Bridal in May. We will also have the option of finding her dress in a variety of stores since it will be prom season. Of course being the girl that she is, she has threaten to wear sneakers, and declares herself a tomboy... NOT if you be trying to show cleavage?!? Somebody get her a dictionary please.

At any rate, it was with great pleasure that she actually wanted to try on dresses (which is the good news), but of course there has to be bad news and now we are going to have to declare war on her not trying to choose some hot chick dress. Contrary to what she believes, the theme of our wedding is not hoochie!! lol

Here's what she tried on....
......can you guess which was her favorite!?!?

All in all, we are pretty lucky though since we only have to dress one female and I've read plenty of bridesmaids wedding shopping horror stories. I hope we stay this way!

Three Times The Charm!

On the last day of 2010 and the day before a new year was to begin, Sha and I began another adventure of wedding dress shopping. This would be our 5th time out and our last as our goal was to purchase and not just window shop. So for the third time we ventured over to David's Bridal determined to find 'thee' one. We had been to David's Bridal twice before, once to the Manhattan store and once to the Brooklyn store, and although we saw a few that we liked we hadn't made any final decisions. This time though, we were not leaving empty handed and in fact we didn't. We are now just waiting for our attire to be shipped and in about two months our outfits will be hanging patiently in our closets.

Here is some of the fun we had and some of the dresses we liked and disliked.....


Sha's try-ons:::

Dai's try-ons:::

In all the excitement neither myself, Sha or our daughter thought to take a picture of Sha in her 'chosen' one. Speaking  for myself I just know that I was so awestruck by my lovely bride to be that all I could do was say 'wow', and I total forgot to take a picture. As for my 'chosen' one, although we do have a few pictures I am opting not to add them here so that there is some element of "awww" on our big day for family and friends.

Wedding challenges and beyond....

Although there are many challenges and setbacks when planning a wedding I always hold on to the fact that things can be so much worse and I try to stay optimistic. It's very similar to how I live my every day life.

Being upset, down and defeated is so much easier than thinking of another way to go about things, trying something different and admitting that perhaps it was not in the cards. Now that is the real challenge and there is nothing wrong with challenging yourself. In fact, the mind, body and soul needs that to stay fresh, vibrant, healthy and smart!

Challenges are especially hard when you beat yourself up over things you cannot control. So in essence, I've stopped stressing over things I can not control. After all, if it's not controlled by me, why should I own it... especially when it's negativity.

Right now things are relatively quiet with a little over 7 months to go but as we go about planning our special day in July there are things that still need to be thought about, decided and paid for (yikes!).

Today I came across a most interesting wedding and it just made me realize that our challenges are merely a speck on the wall that nobody notices as they pass through the halls of life....

Please check out:
A Wheelie Special Wedding

Social Media & Gay-Wedding Planning

An interesting article (link below).

Family Meeting :  How social media has changed the face of gay-wedding planning.
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Like with most things it really depends upon the type of person you are and whether or not having family support means the world to you, or very little to you since you are going to be you no matter what.

I tend to lean towards the later, and always have.....

Traditions, from the untraditional....

As a couple who is nontraditional, having a nontraditional wedding, and wanting to make it unique in some nontraditional ways....it's hard to stay away from some of the traditions that come with weddings. Confused yet?...so are we....lol

If I were to sit here and type out the many ways this wedding has changed, I would be in front of my computer for at least 2 days. It's now December and we are a little more than 7 months out with several things still not confirmed. In a way it's been hard to narrow things down since the cruise line takes care a lot of the larger details, but the small ones are what's sticking me like thorns on a rose.

Although I know the bigger picture of the wedding with remain the same (we are 100% doing it on a cruise ship), I have a feeling the smaller details will go through another transformation and so I sit here with baited breath............
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