2 Months; to the Day!

I can't believe we are two months to the day until our wedding and our wedding planning journey has almost come to an end. There has been LOTS going on even though I haven't blogged about it. Some are very small things that ad up to a lot, while others are being kept under wraps because they are still in the workings.

One of the more interesting things, at least from my perspective is the whole RSVP issue. I had read so many stories of how that is the least favorite part of wedding planning, very close to the horror of making a seating chart from what I read, but I still went into with an open mind and an open heart as I know life is busy and sometimes people do forget. Of course, reading these articles made me say to myself 'it can't be that difficult', 'these people must be exaggerating', and 'no one is that forgetful'....but in the end I had to join the majority as it was a horror story in some cases, but just like with life....we got through.

The other interested thing that has come out of this planning so far is seeing how this type of planning CAN add to a relationship both good, and not so good feelings. Good feelings as far as coming to a mutual understanding whether it be in choosing a venue, colors, a menu etc... and bad feelings as far struggling to decide who you can and can not invite due to money constraints. As I do always try to see the good, it does make us realize that we have some awesome people in our lives who do wish to be there in love and in support. For that we are thankful.

My last thought about planning thus far is more in reference to 'how' we are doing this. Wedding planning being stressful enough we had the nerve enough to take on the challenge of not only traveling right after, as in the same day, but invite those we love to join. In the beginning this didn't seem like a challenge at all, we were sooooooooooo HAPPY about the idea of cruising as a group and having some of what we thought would be the most fun with the best laughs. Most people know we can really be social butterflies when we want to be.

Now though, I realize that my idea of fun is not everyone else's. Sha and I have always been the type to go in with a positive attitude, find our own fun and if things weren't up to our speed make it such that we enjoy it because in truth we are blessed. We both come from a place that if we followed in the footsteps of those who have come before us we would never go any where, never experience anything new, and have no great stories to tell. So we are looking forward to some summer time fun, especially deserved after two years of wedding planning with no vacation in between.

Now me personally, I do find it important to yes plan for the future, but also to live in the now. As a society we are so fixated on the 'next' that we often forget the 'now'. Heck just take a look at modern technology, the emphasis we place on it in our lives and how we react to it when something new comes along. I don't ever want to miss anything because I'm so busy looking for the 'next' best thing. For life is to short and if I preoccupy myself with the next, I may miss the blessings that are right in front of me. So as they say, I'm stopping to 'smell the roses'.

So with only two months to go I am not only busy with planning, but I am feeling happy, reflective, and blessed.

Not defeated by an invitation....

Well the invitations have been sent and if I thought any part of this wedding planning was a challenge I was wrong until I tried to DIY my own invitations. Now for those who are crafty this would probably be like a relaxing cool breeze, but for me it was stressful. At times I felt like I was standing on an edge of a cliff about to swat an annoying fly which would send me plunging into my descent.

Even though my sweetie was always in my corner, telling me things would be fine and I could do this......there were times I just didn't believe it and wanted to throw in the towel. I hung in there though, and even though I am not truly happy with the finished product I am glad that I didn't give up, that I wasn't defeated by paper and a printer, and in the end I do not have to label myself a quitter.

Our 'Boarding Pass' Cruise Ship Wedding Invitation

STDs (The Fun Kind!)

As a DIY (do it yourself) novice I decided to try and save a buck by creating our own STDs (save-the-dates) for our wedding. Sharine and I had been researching STDs long before we had definite plans of our wedding and we realized that there was just so much to choose from, plus nothing came cheap once you said 'wedding'. We also realized that our cheapest route would be either an online printing company like (http://www.vistaprint.com/, http://www.123print.com/, http://www.magnetstreet.com/ etc...) or a DIY project by using materials from places like http://www.micheals.com/, http://www.joann.com/, http://www.hobbylobby.com/, etc..). This realization made it easy for me to at least TRY a DIY project and with the help of http://www.vistaprint.com/, and some materials from a paper store I believe we were successful.

After all, we all know that eventually STDs, invitations, thank you cards etc... all end up in one place no matter how much the sender spent.

In the garbage! lol
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Save-the-Date Photo Magnet
- I designed these at http://www.vistaprint.com/, it's a wonderful site where you can create all kind of things and use your own photos and personal touches.
- The envelopes we purchased at a paper store in Manhattan
- The ribbon is good ole' fashion curly ribbon

The Full Packet
- We included the STD magnet, and a note
- The note was a poem I made up for the occasion

Return Address Labels
- We had some clear address labels already (from staples) so I just added a heart to it.

Putting It All Together
- Sha and I prepare each packet for mailing

The Great Registry Debate

There is a great debate that some may know about out, but all those who are planning a wedding do know about; to register or not to register, for gifts that is.

Now wedding etiquette says that you must register for you are starting a new marriage household and need things to help build that foundation. Wedding etiquette also says, that if you don't register you are sending the message that all you want is money which is a no no in the world of weddings.

So as most people know Sharine and I have been together for eleven years now and five of those years we have actually shared a household along with our kids. Now when sharing a household you tend to accumulate even more especially when there are 4 people living in it. Keeping this in mind we have begun our own debate. Not a debate on whether we should register or not, but where to register. After equally deciding we did not want to register we were reminded that if we didn't it would scream 'give us money', but also people have already begin asking us where are we registered?.

That is a loaded question.

With so many places that you can be registered at it's really hard to decide. Then when you top that with the fact that we don't want to register it makes the 'where' decision even harder.

So as we begin to look at the usual places like discount stores (Target, Walmart etc..), department stores (Macys), and speciality stores (Bed, Bath & Beyond, Crate & Barrel etc...) it makes me realize I have to begin to stress myself over choosing things I do not really need. Then of course you read & hear : well just upgrade what you already have. But what if you like what you already have? and why should you have money being spent on something you already have that works perfectly well?!?

Okay now just when you think the decision couldn't be any harder comes the whole modern technology twist; online registries. Now this twist doesn't just come with the fact that you can register with the above mentioned stores online, it also comes with the fact that there are even more registry choices; honeymoon registries, buying a house registries, and even the giant elephant in the room cash registries. Now compound this with the fact that we are getting married on a cruise ship and the cruise line ask that we let guest know that due to security reasons they cannot board with presents.

I believe I've just fainted and gone to registry hell!

Make Up Trials (Round #2)

So Sha and I had our 2nd make-up trials yesterday. Our original make-up artist who's work we liked could not re-book us when we changed our date from May to July.

This time around I went for a more dramatic eye look since I wear glasses. I really liked the job she did. Sha on the other hand felt she looked to made up this time around. So although she loved her eyes, the foundation was a bit much for her. I won't say that she looked like a corpse, cause she already said it lol.

At any rate, we were really hoping that her make-up could be a little less made up on the day of the wedding as we really liked the make-up artist and want to work with her. She seemed really friendly with a down to earth personality. As she did my make-up she asked me questions about the wedding and we chit chatted a bit. Her sister who is also a make-up artist worked on Sha and she was quieter.

Today I emailed the make-up artist to tell her that although I liked her work, Sha was not very pleased with her look. It was a very nice surprise when I read her response that apologized for it and offered to do both our make-up on the day of the wedding (Sha had really liked the way she kept me looking more natural). This is especially nice considering she would have to start at least an hour earlier and we are already meeting her early in the morning.


Here are the before & after pictures:

Dana

Sharine

Flowers, Take III

So with a change of venue comes, a change in vendors.

Back in May we found a florist out in CT where we were initially going to get married. Then when we changed our venue there was no way we could work with her since she was in CT and our new venue was on a cruise ship in the Manhattan port. At any rate, once we canceled with her in September (no contract had been signed) we got to see the true professional that she was -check out my 'How Rude!' entry in September-. Nevertheless, we had to go back to the drawing board with the flowers for two reasons: (1) there are restrictions on what you can bring on the ship and  (2) ordering from the cruise line was WAYYYY out of this world budget wise.

So off to searching we went and came across Angel's Accents. Always the skeptic, and never 100% sure I want to deal with a company that is online only, I've thrown caution to the wind and booked! Not only did I like what I saw (there are zillions of pictures), but she comes highly recommended on all three of the wedding forums I belong to.

Finally, I can smell the roses!

No Worries, Mon!

So we all know that the 'Carnival Splendor' has not been that splendid for the last few days, and that Sha and I will be getting married on a Norwegian cruise ship in about 8 months from now. So as I sit here watching the news for the last few days I am wondering what our invited guest who are cruising with us must be thinking. Most are first time cruisers so I imagine them in front of their own televisions shaking their heads and saying to themselves "oh oh, what am I getting myself into".

Although Sha and I do not consider ourselves experts on cruising with only two short cruises under our belts, we do know that what occurred is considered very rare in the cruising industry. After all there are hundreds of cruise ships out on the ocean every day and vacationers are having the opportunity to enjoy their trips without incident. In fact, cruising is safer than flying and heck even getting in your own or someone else's car.

I do feel for those who were on the Splendor though, after all the smell of feces and rotting food can not be pleasant for even 5 minutes let alone a few days. I just hope that those passengers take it with a grain of salt as they enjoy their first hot water shower in days, a full refund, and a free cruise in the future.

As for those who now maybe second guessing whether they still want to book or not, don't be too alarmed. If our engine happens to go out we'll be thankful it wasn't our plane engine and we'll have some interesting stories to tell as we gobble up free hot liquor and all you can eat SPAM, get our money back and plan a free cruise on the house!

Mine, Mine, Mine! ~jumping up and down~

Many months ago Sha and I went wedding dress 'looking'. I don't want to call it shopping since we actually didn't purchase anything. However, in our 'looking' process we did have the opportunity to try on wedding gowns and get a feel for what we liked, what we didn't like, what worked for our bodies and what didn't work for our bodies. During this 'looking' process we both found something we could live with. There were no 'I found the gown of my dress tears' like you see in the movies or the many television shows, but we did leave the shop with some idea of what would work.

Although we continued to look, and tried on dresses at various places we both agreed that the dresses we found out David's Bridal were the best for our looks, and most certainly for our pockets. Now we are at the point in our wedding planning where we MUST purchase our dresses before the year ends so that we have plenty of time for the dresses to be shipped and for alterations.

Now this is where it starts to go down hill for me.....

When I first found the dress that I intended on purchasing there were not many pictures of it online and not many pictures of brides wearing it. Now, I am constantly seeing this gown on other real brides and it's losing it's luster for me. So now instead of just going back to the store to order the dress I already know that I am going to have to fight the urge to try on some different dresses. In the throw of wedding planning they always say once you find a dress, order it... if not you will be searching and searching and searching because now your expectations are harder to meet and sometimes become unrealistic.

I'm not at the unrealistic mark at all, in fact now I don't even want to spend as much as I would have with my original dress. Having a cruise ship wedding diminishes the number of hours you will have for your ceremony & reception and so the thought of spending so much money on something I will wear about 3 hours makes me want to regurgitate and the fact that I keep seeing pictures of brides wearing the same dress makes me want to poop!!!

Yippeee!!!

I was feeling a little nervous for a while there. I mean, how can you plan a wedding that is also a group trip and no one but the couple and their kids show up. It's a scary thought, but in these hard economic times it is also a realistic thought. This is one of the reasons why we changed our original wedding date. We knew it would give everyone more time to plan and save if they not only wanted to attend the wedding but join us for a week of cruising and sightseeing.

At any rate, over the last few months no one had booked but us. We were beginning to get a little worried that our plans of vacation fun with family and friends was going to turn out to be a week of wondering 'why didn't anyone show'.....

I'm happy to say that the excitement is back in the air now that we have booked guest.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((group hug everyone)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Cruising & The Norwegian Jewel

Every man, woman and child has an opinion. So in essence what I may like, you may dislike and everything is subjective. With that said we LOVE cruising!

Now for some the thought of being on any kind of boat my not equal fun, and knowing that you are vacationing with thousands of others in a shared space may give you the hives. With cruising, although you are on a boat it is not a little canoe that would rock you into vomit-ville but instead a HUGE ship that is more like a floating city. The best part of it for those who think they may get sea sick is that unless you are sailing in a hurricane you don't even feel the movement. Plus, the bigger the ship the less likely you will even remember that you are on the ocean.

As for vacationing with many others, this is something that actually makes cruising fun. You are surrounded by people with smiles on their faces and most are warm, friendly and ready to share the experience. This also makes the entertainment (comedy shows, game nights, theatre shows etc..) on the ship more exciting and fun. Now on the flip side, cruising is not so crazy and loud that you can not find quieter activities to do if you so choose. There is usually a quiet area for lounging, a library, quieter dining options instead of a buffet, and viewing and/or participating in group activities is optional.

One of the best sites for everything cruise is Cruise Critic (www.cruisecritic.com). This site includes information about each cruise line, every cruise ship, photos, reviews by writers as well as reviews by travelers like ourselves. There is something for everyone while cruising!
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Cruise Critic Norwegian Jewel Review (Click for a 2008 review of the ship we will be on by a writer from cruise critic. Note* this was a different itinerary*)

Travelers NCL Jewel Reviews (Click to read recent travelers' reviews of the Norwegian Jewel, with our same itinerary- Florida & Bahamas)

10/10/10 ... Original Wedding Date

Back in August 2009 Sha and I sat down looking through our cell phone calendars for the perfect wedding date. In doing so Sha stumbled upon the date of October 10th, 2010 which would mean a wedding date of 10-10-10. We thought this date would not only be 'cool' but fitting since we would be in our 10th year together.

As we set off wedding planning we realized after visiting a few wedding venues that 10-10-10 would not be in the cards for us. For you see, this was a reality check of how expen$ive weddings could be. We really had no idea how much money was needed to have the kind of wedding we both wanted. Yes, you can get married for say $200 if you just wanted a quick ceremony and no add-ons including a reception. But for us this was not the wedding that matched our personal styles and us as a couple.

So once the financial realization of it sunk in we decided to cancel our 10-10-10 wedding and move towards a wedding in 2011. Eventually we would choose two more wedding date, May 14, 2011 & July 30, 2011 and settle on the later.

Click below for a little information about today's weddings:
10-10-10

On The Flip Side....

Ho hum.... as the wedding planning continues I've reached a level of 'boredom'. The days of colors, linens, room decor, flowers....are GONE. With a shipboard wedding there is really nothing much to do in advance. Yes, we still have to pick out invitations and still have to find attire for us and the kids, but that's pretty much it. Other items such as having music, floral decor, choice of linens are optional, and choosing the menu whether it's a cocktail or sit down reception doesn't have to be done until next May.

Sometimes I miss all the hoopla of having to nit pick over choices and running around town looking at things, but then I remember that that was a nerve wrecking process as it was just to many choices. So again, it's just another sign of one just never being satisfied. One complains when it's to much to do and one complains when it's to little to do! lol

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A thumbs up award goes to.... Mark! (a DJ we were thinking of hiring)

Deposit refund, honored....

Now this is my kind of business!

The Biggest Obstacle

A lot of money...



Well with a change in our wedding plans comes the concerns that cruising would be to much money for guest. Now we will admit, anything these days would probably seem like a lot of money in this financial climate. However, if someone is planning to travel for a week already then it's really a bargain.


First and foremost the cost of a cruise includes ALL meals, entertainment, and on board activities. Most other vacations only include the cost of travel (flying, Amtrak, etc..) and the hotel stay. Unless your at an all inclusive resort, the meals are never included. Secondly, one of the best things a budget traveler like ourselves can have is something with a payment plan, and cruising allows that when you book so far in advance like we have. Lastly, cruising usually allows you to visit more than one place in a weeks time and that's not a bad a deal for those who don't have the opportunity to travel much.

Currently, the cheapest cabin rate for our wedding cruise requires a $250 per person deposit but when mapped out can be paid in full by the April 30th 2011 due date at just $99 a month if starting payments in October (or $49.50 every two weeks if you really want to break it down). Nevertheless, there is also the option of depositing now, and paying the full balance when the tax return comes rolling in! lol
 
Of course if you are paying for more than just yourself (ex: $198 a month for two) it can pricey, but that is with any 7 day vacation. Even going to visit granny down south for a week doesn't come cheap these days!
 
I guess we look at it this way, we can easily spend $99 on crap we have nothing to show for during a months time, so why not spend it on a vacation with lasting memories!

Booked!!!!

We're Cruising Into Marriage!!

So I'm feeling all warm and tingly inside.

In the last two weeks we have gotten confirmation on our wedding booking, and we have booked our cabin with a deposit. It's all feeling real-er, than real!!!

Now this kind of wedding is not for the control freak, the gal that needs to have her hand in every pot, or the bride to be with her finger on speed dial. A cruise ship wedding is set up by the cruise lines' wedding company that they out source to and everything is taken care of by your wedding consultant prior to the day of your wedding. So over the next 11 months our job is just to fill out the forms, send the emails and call the consultants when we want to add features or cancel them all together. Then on the day of the wedding we will work with the ships wedding coordinator to finalize and then take that loving walk down the aisle to marriage.

Although Sha and I started out planning a more traditional affair we realize that even if we have to put our wedding in the hands of consultants & coordinators, ultimately a cruise ship wedding is the wedding that says:

' Dana & Sharine '

Can I Get Confirmation On That!!

Waiting for someone else to give confirmation on something can be the start of one of those terrible mind games. It makes you contemplate, second guess, and even wonder if something has gone horribly wrong.

As this wedding planning saga continues we are in the process of waiting for full confirmation that our deposit for our new wedding venue has been received. Now mind you, I know banks have to clear and paperwork has to be processed but this doesn't calm the nerves when you are just so excited about a new adventure.

The funny thing is, I know this is only the beginning. 

When you plan the type of wedding that we are now working towards most of the details our out of your hands. Therefore, the whole process is full of waiting and confirmations. Now for a control freak such as myself, I am not sure how this is going to work but I know in the end I will get the best confirmation of all.

That I am married to my sweetheart Sharine.

Wedding Websites

I think personal wedding websites are the coolest thing since slice bread. It's the easiest and fasted way to get information to guest  and there is so much information on the web that most questions can be answered, especially when planning a destination wedding. It also gives you an opportunity to get quick feedback and help in the entire planning process from start to finish.

With a change in our plans there also had to come a change to our site.

Click..
click..
clicking away...

Anticipation...is making me wait...well no more like making me crazy!

Don't you just hate when your all set to do something and your bubble is burst!!! That's how I felt yesterday.

We were all set to finalize our *new* wedding plans and the person we needed to see was out for the rest of the week. I had just spoken to him on Tuesday which was his first day back to work since he works Tuesday-Friday, so of course I was totally surprised when here we are two days later ready to plan and his colleague tells us he won't be back to work until next week. UGHH!!

And so we wait......

Bridesmaids Dresses

There are so many different ways to dress your bridesmaids now.

Long gone are the cookie-cutter bridesmaids that appeared to be more like Stepford Wives. Brides are allowing her girls to pick their own dresses so long as they are in a particular color, or they're wearing their favorite black dress already hanging in their closets and or even just wearing what they find most flattering on their own bodies. I feel bridesmaid's have come along way in terms of looking fashion forward, comfortable and feeling stunning.

Call me old fashion but one of my least favorite styles is the 'print' bridesmaids dresses. For some reason this is an awkward look; and please don't let it be red with any kind of lines on it for my brain immediately screams picnic table. My favorite style though (and again maybe I'm old fashion) is the matching bridesmaids. Now this doesn't mean all dresses, all shoes, and all accessories are matching, but matching in the sense that all the bridesmaids are wearing the same color. For me this is 'semi classic' and for a non traditional bride like myself it is probably the closest thing to traditional my wedding would be, that is if we were able to have bridesmaids.

Wedding planning is a trip.

So many questions, choices, and decisions to make and just when you thought you had it all figured out.......
.................... you don't.

We've recently come to the conclusion that this wedding should be about us; and that we need to stop making our plans based on what will make everyone else comfortable. Yes, we want it to be just as special for our guest, but when all is said and done no wedding guest will store 'our' wedding in the section of their memory bank marked 'best thing that has ever happened to me'; in fact a year later they may not even remember much about the day that was special for you. So we've had to seriously ask our selves the questions...

* In the long run who has to be completely happy with the wedding experience?!?!
* Who has to have a lasting memory that says 'I loved it'?!?!
* Who does the wedding really have to reflect!?!?

....and in our answers there was a reoccurring theme...

....'us'.

Giving Thanks...

I would like to believe that even if I were as straight as an arrow I would believe in marriage equality for all.

In fact, I know I would and today I just found another hero;  Click Here.